Former United States Army (Shattered Glass)
Former G.I. Joe Medical (SG), now Cobra
|“||Don't squirm. This is all just part of the job.||”|
The illegitimate product of a politician's illicit tryst with his young intern, Eddie Skeeve grew from a selfish young pervert into a grown-up version. A self-professed sadist, Eddie gets a huge kick out of inflicting pain upon people, and so he went into the medical field to learn the best possible ways to do just that. Carries a Heckler & Koch USP, along with surgical implements that may or may not have been sanitized inside a bottle of vodka.
You see a man in his late 20s - early 30s, who stands a few inches shy of 6 ft. tall, and has an average build. Despite his slightly below-average height, he seems taller at first glance, because of his rather imposing appearance.
His waist-long hair is dark, snagged into a wild, raven ponytail which hangs down his back. A 5 o'clock shadow adorns his lower face, and there's usually a lit cigarette dangling from his lip when he speaks. His wild brown eyes are partially obfuscated behind green-tinted prescription glasses. Both ears are outfitted with countless piercings, bars, and chained adornments.
He's dressed in a dull grey 'wifebeater' style tank top, which is tucked into a pair of form-fitting camo pants. Over the tank top, he wears a black leather jacket shell with the sleeves ripped out. His exposed arms are adorned with all sorts of tribal tattoos, from his biceps down to his wrists. His hands are covered with black leather fingerless 'biker' gloves. These seem to match his knee-high, black leather steel toe boots.
He also wears a fairly obvious belt holster with ammo clips, and a Heckler & Koch USP.
(Note, these are not assumed to be known by everyone. Those with law enforcement and criminal investigative backgrounds may find them out ICly, with a little work!)
Cyrus, Edwin C. Steen, Eddie, Jeff Boyardee, Burt Dinwiddie
The illegitimate product of a politician's illicit tryst with his young intern, Eddie Skeeve grew from a selfish young pervert into a grown-up version. A self-professed sadist, Eddie gets a huge kick out of inflicting pain upon people, and so he went into the medical field to learn the best possible ways to do just that.
Following a scientific crew to the Arctic, he found out about Professor Arkeville's discovery of the slumbering Skyfire, although he had to kill one of Arkeville's men to get close enough to see what they were doing, and was subsequently chased off.
Killing a trucker and returning with a truck, Deadline passed himself off as "Jeff Boyardee," one of Ross's men, although that alias hasn't passed further investigation.
Deadline then terrorized Lt. Bludd at a book signing, completely disregarding the fact that he was giving the Lieutenant crucial information regarding his son, Scott Bludd. All Eddie was interested in was seeing the horrified look on Bludd's face, when the doctor informed him that Doc was using the young man as a guinea pig for terrible medical experiments.
Deadline had a hand in capturing Spike Witwicky, and bringing him back to the Pit for interrogation. Just for fun, he chained Spike down, and threw a tarantula and scorpion on his chest, just to watch them fight it out.
In late December, while cooling his heels at a trucker's diner outside of Springfield, Eddie spotted Slipstream, and attempted to apprehend him. However, Greg stayed one step ahead of him, and managed to get away. Eddie was pounced by a number of Good Samaritan truckers, who held him down until the police arrived to take him to county jail. Eddie was booked under a fictitious name.
In February 2010, after the Joes released Spike and Buster Witwicky and Buster kicked spike out of his dilapidated house, Deadline agreed to let Spike live with him in his trailer. To Spike, this was a gesture of friendship, and a gesture that he was certainly entitled to since Deadline was the one who brought Spike and Buster into the Joe base. However, as always, Deadline has other motives, specifically collecting approximately $25,000 in "fees" Spike has racked up for Deadline's services. Deadline and Spike travelled to the positive-polarity main universe to see what opportunities presented themselves there. Eventually, Deadline's involvement in Spike's life led to the elder Witwicky brother's death. In 2012 Spike's younger brother Buster discovered Deadline's involvement in Spike's death, and has set out to get revenge.
Deadline occasionally worked with Ebony on various assignments. The two grew close and later decided to marry, with Ebony using Scarlett's ID. However, Deadline, being the free spirit that he is, began having an affair with a low-level Chicago drug dealer named Geddy. The two have since fled Chicago as the police began to close in on Deadline's involvement in an unsolved homicide. As of 2013, the two are believed to be traveling the country in a stolen RV, with the Joes, the Chicago police, and a vengeful Ebony in pursuit.
In late June, 2013, Eddie suffered an accidental heroin overdose, and nearly died. Thanks to the quick action of Angel and Eddie's cartel enforcer Elron, he recovered without brain damage. Elron recommended to Eddie that he go into rehab, and Eddie expressed an interest in going that route.
On June 26, 2013, Eddie checked into a 'celebrity rehab' clinic, thanks in part to his lawyer Sal's underworld connections. Eddie's personal goal is to kick his destructive heroin habit, and stay clean from it with methadone. Going through this rehab ordeal with him was Geddy, who also checked in under an alias, and faked a heroin addiction he didn't actually have. Eddie left the clinic three weeks later, armed with a healthy supply of methadone.
On August 4, 2013, Eddie and Geddy were staying at a hotel when G.I. Joe operative Sgt. Mace knocked on the door, impersonating a prospective drug buyer. Mace then announced he was arresting Eddie and a struggle ensued with Eddie and occasionally Geddy gaining up on Mace. Mace was finally able to get the upper hand and arrest Eddie in connection to the deaths of at least 11 people in Denver. Eddie is was held without bail, but escaped justice.
Eddie has since joined Cobra as a Dreadnok.
In 2017 Eddie & Geds were hanging out at the Broca Beach mall, which was closing up. Eddie was high as a kite, and decided that since he hadn't eaten in about 3 days he was going to have pretzels at Auntie Anne's for dinner. He headed over there, and who's working the counter, but.... his old friend SAL! Sal's response was something to the effect of, "YOU RUINED MY LIFE!!" Ever-sympathetic Eddie replied, "Quit whining an' get me some pretzels." It was a heart-warming reunion.
Deadline is the evil mirror version of Lifeline.
While Deadline has worked for G.I. Joe, he is also an independent agent of his own choosing. Therefore, if someone wishes to have some medical work done, they have to track him down, because he isn't particularly reliable when he's out pursuing his own pleasures. If a patient pays him enough in money, sex, or drugs, he'll use some sort of painkiller; but otherwise, he performs his work without them.
Deadline is a hedonist who enjoys being under the influence of alcohol or drugs, and so he is very frequently found in that state. It is said that he's a much nastier person when he's sober.
One might think that he is incapable of feeling compassion such as his counterpart in the main TF universe, but this would be an incorrect assumption. Eddie has just as much compassion as Edwin Steen; however, in the Shattered Glass universe, the sentiment is twisted around into sharing his opiate/hallucinogenic drugs with other junkies, or other warped, hedonistic offers too heinous to mention here.
Despite his crude mannerisms, Eddie actually has an innate talent for his work, which has led to an excellent word-of-mouth reputation for his medical skills. This is why he's successful with an Army and freelance career simultaneously. But don't count on him for a cheerful bedside manner; he works on patients as if they were objects, as if he were a mechanic taking apart a defective car. He enjoys the challenge of fixing what's wrong with a patient, but he has no empathy for their concerns.
10/15/09: Message for the Joes and President Colton.
"Deadline reporting from the Arctic Circle. At approximately 1930 hours last evening, I trailed a scientific convoy northward, where some sort of archeological dig site was being excavated. Present at the site was Dr. Arkeville, Sephie Beller, and Dr. Over-Kill, so I knew this was probably something big. After sneaking onto one of the scientific teams, I went into the excavation site to find out what it was."
(He pauses to light up a cigarette. After taking a few drags, he continues)
"You're not gonna believe what I found. This is bigger than big; this is HUGE. On the site, encased in a glacier, was a big f-cking ROBOT. I mean...think of a skyscraper. At LEAST 50 ft. tall. Loaded down with the most AMAZING weapons. Just...I can't even describe it better than that. And if we don't act soon, these communist pinko pansies are going to own it! They'll probably put it in the Gay Museum of Father-F-kin-Cobra and put flowers on it."
(He tosses the cigarette butt behind him)
"Take it from me. This one's worth the effort. -- Oh! Before I forget...there were also some gay robots on scene. One of them looked like a...cat, and the other was a flying...thing. I'm pretty sure both of them were gay. One of them was even wearing perfume or some sh-t. Deadline out."
10/17/09: Deadline's Memorandum to General Flint.
"Man, listen up. I got the Mounties on my ass. RCMP is investigating a couple homicides. They were necessary collateral damage, okay? One of them I killed to get access to the excavation site, and the other I gacked to get access to his truck, cause news flash: it's cold as f-ck up here. I need these cops paid off...get the heat off me, and there's something in it for you. I got my hands on some premium steroids. This is the good sh-t that costs thousands per injection, and you'll be able to see the results after a couple shots. Lemme know if it sounds like a fair trade." "Gotta go; I need to get the semi parked in a better place. Deadline out."
11/08/09: Deadline Visits Spike
(Warning: LANGUAGE/Mature Situations) Deadline pays a house call to Spike Witwicky to confirm if there really is a transforming robot residing at the residence, and he gets a bit more than he bargained for. 
11/10/09: Report From Pit
(Eddie is reporting from the dank stankhole that is the Pit Infirmary. Behind him is Barbecue (SG), bandaged from head to toe in bloody bandages, like a mummy)
- "Hey, kids. I'm BAAACK. Didja miss me? First thing I'd like to say is directed to my medical staff -- you know who you are. You're a bunch of retarded jackasses. Thanks to you, we nearly lost another patient. AGAIN. Good thing I came in when I did. How many times I gotta tell you bungholes?! Don't use bandages that have been PREVIOUSLY USED. Duh!"
(He lights a cigarette, puffs it a few times, then continues)
"Anyhow, listen up. While I was in Seattle last weekend, I found something incredible. One of my clients has a transforming robot holed up in his garage. And NO, I'm not tripping. I got the street address if you wanna check it out. It's legit. The robot's name is Goldbug (SG), and he's disguised as a VW Bug. Don't try to take him on alone; he'll try an' fry you." (Eddie shows off his slightly burned hand) "Just sayin'. And then you'll hafta come see me, which I know is a thrillin' experience for everyone involved. ...That's really all I got for now. Deadline out."
11/16/09: Operation Casanova
Fueled with confidence from his latest discoveries, Eddie has decided that his next conquest will be Spike's ex-wife and Cain's current paramour, Carly Banas (SG).
- Update 11/28: After looking extremely promising, this plan fails harder than Eddie ever dreamed possible.
- Update 12/04: Following the initial failure of this plan, Eddie redoubled his efforts, and finally met with success -- which gave him a little something to crow about when he next encountered Spike Witwicky (SG).
12/05/09: Spike Witwicky (SG) Captured
(Eddie appears in the Infirmary, smoking a cigarette and appearing to be stoned)
"Deadline reporting a partial mission success. It's partial because...well, we accomplished about half of what we set out to accomplish. But a partial victory is a hell of a lot better than a total failure. Let me explain. On Dec. 4 at 4:00 pm Pacific Time, I paid a visit to Spike Witwicky, an' found him alone in the house. I went to check the garage for the robot, but unfortunately, the robot was no longer residing on the premises. I tried forcing the information out of Spike, but kept gettin' slightly different stories about why the robot left, an' the robot's current whereabouts -- Interrogation might wanna lean on him to see if he'll produce a story that's a little more consistent."
"Good news is: myself, Temera, an' Ebony successfully took Spike into custody without incident. He was taken alive, an' is currently residing in the Pit brig. Like I said before, he was alone in the house. His brother Buster wasn't home at the time. So if y'want me to go back an' bring him in, I can do it, but honestly? His brother's seriously stupid. I don't think questionin' him would be a good use of our time or resources. That's the situation as it stands now. Deadline out."
(Read the log of it here.)
In February 2010, after the Joes released Spike and Buster Witwicky and Buster kicked spike out of his dilapidated house, Deadline agreed to let Spike live with him in his trailer. To Spike, this was a gesture of friendship, and a gesture that he was certainly entitled to since Deadline was the one who brought Spike and Buster into the Joe base. However, as always, Deadline has other motives, specifically collecting approximately $25,000 in "fees" Spike has racked up for Deadline's services.
- March 15 - "Ebony v Snake-Eyes... Round 1! FIGHT!" - Ebony and Snake-Eyes meet in Seattle... violence ensues.
- April 27 - "Close Call" - The SG Joes nearly blow their cover. And Deadline receives some much-needed advice on fatherhood from...SG Spike. Uh...okay.
- April 29 - "Red to the Rescue" - The SG joes decide to Move, and Scarlett Decides to rescue their Captives.
- "Fin" - Nightfall teaches Cliff, the bartender at 1308, how to make a mixed drink and later tags along with Deadline to pay failSpike a visit.
- July 20 - Two drink minimum - Scarlett takes a night off from construction of the New Pit. She should have chosen a better bar.
- August 17 - Meeting of the Outcasts - Over Kill calls for a 'meeting of the outcasts' in a bar outside of Las Vegas.
- December 11 - A Meeting of the Minds - On a snowy December evening, Deadline and Lt Bludd have an unlikely meeting. Dr. Over-Kill entreats the two to consider the perils of the portals.
- May 19 - Tres Vignettes - Three scenes that happen just prior to Sgt. Mace's undercover investigation of Eddie's Denver drug operation. Starring spikewitwicky as Sal (the lawyer) and Elron (the enforcer), as well as Geddy the boytoy. Mature subject matter; something wicked this way comes. You have been warned.
- May 20 - Sgt. Mace Undecover Op - Little does Deadline know, his cartel operation is being staked out by one of the best undersover operatives in the business! Sgt. Mace goes undercover to make a drug buy...and then things get REALLY hectic when Hound and Sit-Com make an appearance! As always, MATURE SUBJECT MATTER/LANGUAGE.
- April 11 - "Lucky Meeting You Here" - Cobra Commander meets with an odd group of underlings, even for Cobra.