Things You See in the Desert

Log Title: Things You See in the Desert Characters: Cookie, Kamakura, Trojan Location: Southwester United States Date: October 11, 2019 TP: non-TP Summary: Cookie and Kamakura meet an unusual Autobot in the desert As logged by  Cookie

Log session starting at 21:04:09 on Friday, 11 October 2019.

Cookie has a clear road to drive and there's not much traffic, so she's taking her old but trusty truck along the road back out into more desert.

'''Kamakura is riding with Cookie today, enjoying the long desert roads. The soldier watches the road with his blue eyes, relaxed a bit. He's wearing jeans and a hoodie today, completely detached from his ninja self. Today he's Sean and today hes haivng some time off with a friend.'''

'''There is nothing quite like the desolation of the desert. Heat radiation distorted the barren roads. Dust clouds swirl loose sand in sweeping eddies, and there is nothing but scrub and dune and giant spider monstrosities as far as the eye can see. '''

Record Scratch.

'''That's right. The only towering thing on the horizon is the stuff of nightmares, a mech bearing no seal of loyalty, looming like a bogeyman in anticipation of its next victim! Maybe. Situated next to this monolithic monstrosity is the comically incongruous placement of a normal-sized mail box and... a sign, which bears the words: 'Amazon Distribution Point'. '''

'''Cookie slows, shifting gears down as she takes another look. "Sean.. tell me you see that, too." She points in the direction of the giant half-spider robot.'''

'''Kamakura looks to the spider. "Yep. I see it." he says. "Spiderbot. If only I had a giant metal shoe.." He says. "It doesnt seem aggressive. We shoudl radio in to base, see if anyone knows if thats one of the good ones or bad ones.'''

'''Cookie nods. "Got a phone you can snap a picture with?" She reaches for the radio to call in.'''

'''If the towering terror noticed the tiny truck approaching, it gave no indication. It was still as one would expect of a spider sitting astride her web; the massive, main arms were drawn close in, as if she held something of interest close to her breast. The nearer the human vehicle came, the more they might become aware of some sickly green vapour that swirled and streamed from the eyeslits in the visor. And should they get so close to the mail box, one could actually see the thing that Trojan was cradling: A dolly. A human child size dolly, held aloft and manipulated by long, thin, skeletal sub-fingers that lanced from the back of her knuckles.'''

[G.I. Joe] Cookie says, "Hey, I'm out in the desert and there's a giant half-spider shaped robot out here. Anybody know who it is?"

'''Kamakura reaches into his pocket. "Always." He takes the picture and starts to send it in.'''

[G.I. Joe] Kamakura says, "Guys heres a pic <sends a picture of Trojan in spider mode, holding a human child sized doll in her hand) Not sure if thats a child or.. oh thank God. I think its a doll."

'''Cookie slows down more. "So.. do we avoid the giant creepy robot, or get a closer look?"'''

'''Kamakura pauses. "I think we need to get a closer look. I want to make sure thats a doll not..something worse."'''

[G.I. Joe] Specialist Ashiko says, "..."

'''This little effigy was of the gothic, antique bent: porcelain and not plastic, dark, Victorian era attire of satin and lace that was not polyester. Those tiny, tapering manipulators were busy making the little doll dance and pirouette with a touch so delicate, one could hardly believe it possible. Yet, there she was, engaging the little toy with a gentleness that suggested ultra-sensitivity. Once the duo had drawn as close as they dare, the mech craned her head. This was heralded by a grate and grind of ancient gears and servos. Trojan leaned forward just so, as to effectively loom like the terror she at first appeared to be. "You," it hissed sussurantly, voice a cacophony of modulated voices both male and female, but more the latter, "Are... NAHT.... the regu-LAR driversssss."'''

'''Cookie drives close enough to chat, but far enough to be out of range of the first swing.. hopefully. She has a lot of faith in her beat up old truck, but who knows how fast a giant robot can move? The Joe mechanic rolls down her window and leans out. "We're not delivery drivers, no. We're just passing through."'''

'''The little poppet was manipulated with perfect precision, turned so that the lifeless eyes of the diminutive doll was likewise observing the humans in the pickup, with hips shifted to convey some empowered attitude. The effect was both scary and hilarious, with the child's plaything being overshadowed by the terrifying titan. "...That issss... unFFFFor-TUNE-et. My PAR-Csssselssssss are late," lamented the mech, petulantly, in that eerie discord of death. Trojan's upper body drew back, so she was no longer looming over the road. "Am... exPECT-ing... Dressssessss... for my dollsssss. Isssss hARD to find... driverssss to deLIV-ar to placessss with... direct-SHUNsss like, 'Look for Big Sssssspider' at co-ordin-atesssss.... "'''

Cookie vows to herself never to complain about UPS drivers ever again.

'''Kamakura is sitting in the side car, quietly, letting Cookie take the lead. "We come in peace or whatever that is." He says. "Are you..what are you doing out here?" He asks. "Collecting ...doll dresses? Do you live around here? Are you lost?"'''

'''"Am Auto-BAHT," explains the mech, as she turned the dolly about. That explains... some things. "Am called Tro-JAHN, and I.... sssshop the In-TARnetssssss too," which fills in a few more blanks for the pair of civvie-clad Joes. "I CO-llect.... vin-tAGE dollssssss."'''

[G.I. Joe] Kamakura says, "okay its an Autobot called trojan. should be safe."

'''Cookie looks about, and, seeing nobody else on the road for miles, just pulls a bit off the side, deciding it's safe enough to park for the moment. Though she's taller from the inside of her truck. "It's nice to meet you, Trojan. I'm Laura, and this is Sean. Is this where you usually stay?"'''

'''Apparently, Trojan appreciates company that does not drive up, throw out boxes, and then drive away screaming, for the little dolly disappears -somewhere- into her amalgam of armor plating, and the skeletal precision digits withdraw into the knuckles of the monstrous fists. "I ssssstay in... Metro-Plexssssss," the miasma of haunting voices discloses. "Fffrom where do you come, Laura and Sssssean?" She idly lowers her entire body a little further, an act punctuated by a painful sounding groan of gears.'''

'''Kamakura looks to the dolly as it disappears. "We're just driving by." he says. "We're from a nearby military base. Off duty right now, though." he says as he atches her. Shes strange for a Cybertronian.'''

'''There is some minor adaptation that occurred in Trojan's pattern of speech. While she cannot help that ghastly modulation and ever-present hiss, she is acclimating better structure. "Ssssoldierssss," repeats Trojan, experimentally. "Issssss good to.... MAKE your.... acquain-tancsssssses, and sssssincerely thank you for your.... sssservicsssse." Yes, she is odd. She is probably unlike any mech they've ever met, truth be told. One gets the impression of weary, weary years of haunting experiences. Really - take a good look at her. It's like she was built from the corpses of other dead Cybertronians fused in a plasma blender.'''

'''Cookie pulls her gaze away from some of the parts haphazardly mashed together. She blushes a bit- she still hasn't gotten used to being thanked for her job. "We're glad to serve," she says. "How about you? Are you... alright?"'''

'''Kamakura nods "ANd thank you for yours." he says, relaxing a bit as she doesnt seem to be a threat. "Its nice to meet you too, Trojan." He keeps his voice friendly. Cybertronians are weird after all.'''

'''"The pleasssssure issss... mine, Ssssean and Laura." Every Cybertronian has a personality, and they are not unlike those many and varied natures expressed by humankind. These two have just found the appropriately melancholy, introspective and self-deprecating Goth girl. "That, lovely Laura, isssss a complexssss quessss-tion. I am.... sssstanding in a dessssert, wait-ing FOR.... doll dressssssesss... that were sssssuppossssed to be here yessssterday. Asssss you can imag-ine, my ssssstriking looksssss win me few... friendsssss, even among my own." She again leaned forward, but just so. "I can, however ssssay, that my disssposssition hasssss much been improved... by the timely.... Arrival of you both."'''

'''Cookie puts on a smile. "Do you know how to check the tracking number for your shipments? It's possible there was a delay somewhere along the line."'''

'''Kamakura pauses. "Next time, you should try a deposit box. Someplace safe you can check on them. And yeah a tracking number might help too." he offers.'''

'''"The sssstatussss issss... Out for Delivery, assss it wasss the day be-FORE," confirms Trojan, as she leans just a little closer to get a better look at the two. Both humans are examined in turn by those eerie, seeping optics. "It isssss a common... thing. According to the INTER-NETssss, I am... a... 'Nope'. A 'Nope Ssspider', and, in... my other... form, a 'Nope Rope Nope'." Those massive upper shoulders offer a little, hapless shrug, punctuated by a piquant groan of metal on metal. "A depossssit boxssss would be.... sssswell, but there issss no possst officssssse to housssse me."'''

'''Cookie pictures Trojan with meme captions. That actually helps make her less scary. And gives Cookie an idea. She looks at Kamakura. "We should get selfies." There's that glimmer of bravado in her eyes that shows she's not all -that- different from the Seals she works with.'''

'''Trojan does not seem adverse to this idea. The Tower of Nopeness rights her posture - as much as one might expect such a thing could do - and then lowers her hands to the ground, palms upturned, presenting the humans a platform upon which they may be lifted. Trojan's visage is, after all, up there ^. "That.... ssssoundssss like a fantassssstic... idea." Besides - being up at that altitude would command quite a view of the landscape.'''

'''Kamakura auses. "I dont know. Just a picture with ...her? Might be a good idea. I dont do selfies often." as few of pictures as him as possible. But hes okay with taking pictures of others no problem.'''

'''Cookie grins. "I don't, either. Nothing on Facebook or Instagram. But to keep for myself? Sometimes." She slips out of the truck.'''

'''As steady and still as ever, the monolithic mech awaits. Trojan has already shown assiduous attention to detail and a precision that seemed impossible when handling delicate things. "I... am often photo-graphed... from a dissss-tancsssse, sssssso I do believe... thissss would be my firsssst 'sssselfie'. Come, handssssome Sean, there issssss... nothing to fear from me."'''

'''Kamakura nods "Allright. You..." he approaches with his phone. "Arent afraid of being photographed or anything?"'''

'''"It isssss sssssomething that happenssss, ssso I do not sssstress. Ssstand upon my palmssss, and I will raissssse you both to my sssssshoulder level." One could almost sense that dear Trojan was... actually digging this opportunity as much as Cookie seemed to be. How many other SEALs get this close to a Cybertronian, eh?'''

'''Cookie gets out her phone- her truck may be old enough to vote, but the phone is a smartphone, less than a year old. Also has all the security on it a member of a secret military organization could need. She pulls herself up onto one of Trojan's hands. "You could always stick next to me in case anything happens and keep me safe, right?" she teases Kamakura.'''

'''Kamakura chuckles. "Allright." He says as he moves next to her. "Lets do this." he pulls out his camera. "Okay um.. one...two.." he snaps a shot. "We got it."'''

'''The ascent to a great height is gradual, made terrifying only by the straining sound of ancient servos. Up and up and up the two go, careful and steady, until the humans are roughly eighty to ninety feet in the air, with the plated visage of Trojan behind. The eerie green optics cast ample effect for the ultra-cool selfies they're about to capture. "How isssss.... thisssss....?" inquired the Nope-Bot, haunting voice much amplified by the closer proximity to her modulators.'''

'''Cookie laughs. "Oh, that's amazing!" She puts a hand on Kamakura's shoulder just in case and looks around, twisting to see all sides. "Okay.. if you want to be in this one, stick close," she warns the ninja as she holds up her smartphone. A selfie with a view.'''

'''Kamakura Sticks close as they are brought upwards. "Oh wow. Sometimes I forget just how hih up this can get." he looks around and then moves in closer to get in the shot.'''

'''The best mugging that Trojan can do without removing the lower cowl is to... look terrifying. She's good at that. The unusual Autobot keeps serenely still; she saved her remarks until Laura had caught that Perfect Selfie of the three of them and the horizon. "This wasssss... fun," Trojan admitted. It is a shame that every syllable she uttered sounded like the wail of the damned, for even when she was genuinely enjoying herself, the haunting discord made for a palpable incongruity. So long as Cookie was through with her photography, Trojan would steadily lower them both back to the earth. "I  am... broadcassssting my rad-eeoh.... frequ-encssssy, ssssso you both may contact... me at... any time."'''

'''Cookie ahs. "Hang on, I'll catch it on the truck's radio." She jogs back to her vehicle and sits in the truck, door still open while she notes down the radio frequency. Once she has it down, she stands by the truck and waves. "Thanks for the pictures! We probably ought to get back before anybody misses us."'''

'''Kamakura takes note of the frequency with his phone. "And thanks for the signal. We should keep in touch with you, Trojan." he heads back with Cookie. "Thanks for the chat."'''

'''"I do mean... any time, for any reassssson," emphasized Trojan. "Too often, we lossssse good people to ssssssilly sssscircumsssstancssse, esssspecially thosssse who devote their livesssss to sssservicsssse. You have a friend in me, now; call, and I will... come, even sssssshould the sssstarsss fall from the heavensss. Have a pleassssant evening." And with that, the Autobot resumed her former place, her former stillness, and devoted herself to waiting on a package that might never actually be delivered. Go figure.'''

Log session ending at 23:51:43 on Friday, 11 October 2019.