User blog:Bzero/IC Post: Walking Wounded

Benin-Jeri appears in a report recorded on a wrist-mounted camera in the blasted plains outside Autobot City. He looks even more beat-up than usual, and a deep crack runs between his right optic and his mouth, just below his metal moustache. In a sing-song collection of TV-show samples and patched-together quotes, he records the following:

"Captain's Log, Stardate 92488.45. Since the Decepticons never left an Autobot City primary repair bay without trashing it, my repair crew is going to use every opportunity to take advantage of Autobot City's external repair pods until Blizzard Entertainment and First Aid can get the main bay 'Back in Black'.

"Although injuries were extensive, 'especially amongst our allies,' we amazingly had no 'Finish him! Fatality!'s. It may take weeks to play 'Can you dig it?' with those Autobots stomped into the ground, but due to the SQUEEZABLY soft ground, 'Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world's first bionic man.'

"Until then, back to the salt mines!" With a cracked smile, Ben ends the transmission.