2012

Events involving the year 2012.

Events

 * PetroChina surpasses Blackrock as the largest oil producer in the world.

January

 * January 31 - Hollingsworth takes office as the 33rd Vice Chief of Staff of the Army. He has re-joins the Jugglers, and occasionally intervenes in the Joes' favor on their behalf.

March

 * When an otherworldly Sweep showed up outside Trypticon in March, Illarion went out to meet him, ascertaining it was a Shattered Glass Decepticon called Sunder, and suggested to Scourge that this Sunder might be an excellent source of intelligence on the world on the other side of the rift.

May
After spending several months infiltrating Major Bludd's African contingent, hoping for a chance to apprehend and arrest the wanted mercenary, Duke finally made his move on the morning of May 17th. However, Bludd escaped, and Duke was badly beaten by Vipers before managing to extricate himself and flee the scene. Bludd himself returned to Cobra Unity.

August

 * August 1
 * Dr. Mindbender teaches Interrogator the basic use of the Brainwave Scanner - The Black Major is born
 * Artemis and Angel attack a US base in Germany

September

 * September 22 - "This Isn't Working Out": Sparkplug's physician forces Buster and Spike to make some tough decisions about their father's future after a dementia-related collapse outside his home almost kills the elder Witwicky.

November

 * November 6 - "Honk-a Honk-a Burnin' Clowns" - Starscream rounds up a couple of the 'cons for the usual training when all hell breaks loose in the arena. Hilarity ensues.
 * November 26 - Prime secretly leaves Earth to response to an urgent distress call, taking with him a small team of Autobots.

February 6 - Response to Global Flooding (Cobra Network Television)
A red Cobra logo, its center replaced with the letters 'CNT', fills the screen. A deep male voice says, "This is Cobra Network Television."

"Welcome to CNT's six o'clock news," says a cheery voice, as the Cobra Network Television logo fades to a view of a strawberry blonde newswoman seated behind a desk. "We start with our top story: Cobra's response to the world flooding. Cobra's benificence knows no bounds. Troops and supplies are on their way to people in need all over the world.  Everyone needs help recovering from the global flooding, and Cobra is doing its part to rebuild the planet."

The view changes to a world map, where several locations are marked out with blinking yellow dots. "Major Bludd left early this morning with a flight of Anaconda cargo choppers, headed to Africa." The map slides into the corner and video of the Anacondas lifting off from the helipad at Crown City, Cobra Unity, appears. "Their two-week tour will take in countries in need such as Sierra Leone, Liberia, and Tanzania."

The video ends and the view returns to the newswoman behind the desk. "Other groups are heading to southeast Asia and the United States. Wherever the national governments are unable to help all their citizens, Cobra will be there, restoring life and health to the people of the world. Now it's time for weather with Gunter Baum."

February 8 - More response to global flooding (Cobra Network Television)
A red Cobra logo, its center replaced with the letters 'CNT', fills the screen. A deep male voice says, "This is Cobra Network Television."

Welcome to CNT's six o'clock news," says a cheery voice, as the Cobra Network Television logo fades to a view of a strawberry blonde newswoman seated behind a desk. She speaks, "Continuing the coverage of our top story of the last few days, we have the latest departures from the Crown City helipad, in Cobra Unity. Vypra and a flight of Anaconda's left for a three week tour of locations in Southeast Asia. Included in the official itinerary forwarded from the Baroness' Public Relations Office are stops in," The picture flashes to a Map of Southeast Asia, with Cobra Symbols placed over locations, as the anchor speaks, "Yangon, Myanmar; Bangkok, Thailand; Vientiane, Laos; Hanoi, Vietnam; Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam; Kuala Lampur, Malaysia; Singapore, Malaysia; Jakarta, Indonesia; and Manila, The Philippines."

The video feed returns to the female anchor, and she smiles brightly, "We also have reports that Tomax and Xamot are scheduled to depart in the near future, but the details have not been released yet. We will be sure to announce them as soon as they are! Now it's time for weather with Gunter Baum."

February 10 - US Rejects Cobra's Offer of Aid
US Turns Down Cobra Unity’s Offer of Help Post-Flood

February 18 - Midwest Supply Drops?

 * Special Report*

In a move sure to bring about a diplomatic crisis, but also to bring criticism to the United States Government, supply crates marked with the symbol of The People's Republic of Cobra Unity, and some just Cobra, have started appearing in farms in the Midwest farming belt of the United States, an area hard hit by the recent Decepticon-caused flooding. Included in these crates are emergency rations, bottled water, and seeds for new crops, for the spring planting season.

You might remember that recently the United States government turned down Cobra's offer of assistance. However, it appears that Cobra has decided to ignore this.

One of the farmers that we spoke to had this to say:
 * "If you can't trust the government to help you, it is nice to know that someone out there will... even if it is Cobra. Maybe we were wrong about them."

Not all the assistance is wanted, as just as many of the supply drops have been burnt, as have been picked up.

At this time, we have not yet received a response from our requests for a statement from the United States, the Baroness however released a statement from the C.U. Public Relations Office, that said simply, "Cobra Unity will continue to help where ever our help is needed. If the United States wants to protest, let them. Their citizens will remember who rushed to them, in the hour of their greatest need. Cobra, not their own government!"

We will bring you more on this amazing story as it develops.

Feb 25 - Cobra sends aid to Senegal
AP redistribution of Cobra Network Media release:

Though not part of the official "Africa Tour", Senegal will receive several shipments of relief supplies from Cobra to help them recover from their flood damage. Food, water, clothing, building materials, and medical supplies will be flown to Thies, the only major city to have been spared the flood-waters. The displaced people of The Gambia, which was completely submerged, will also share in the supplies. The good wishes of all of us here in Cobra Unity go out to the Senegalese and the Gambians in this time of crisis.

April 16 - Siberian Massacre
Russian aid workers find the entire town of Norilsk massacred

May 17 - CNT: Attacked in Africa
(CNN and the BBC pick up and rebroadcast this story from Cobra Network Television:)

"Welcome to CNT's six o'clock news," says a cheery voice, as the Cobra Network Television logo fades to a view of a strawberry blonde newswoman seated behind a desk. "I'm Amber Gould. We have been informed that a G.I. Joe agent assaulted a Cobra High Command member in Cote D'Ivoire today. Cobra has been working tirelessly in Africa for several months, in the wake of last year's global flooding, to help the peoples of those nations to rebuild their lands. The notorious G.I. Joe agent known as "Duke", hiding amongst the work details, suddenly attacked Major Bludd, the commander of Cobra's African operations."

A photo of Duke appears in the corner of the screen. "Cobra personnel on-scene were unable to prevent the agent from fleeing the scene after the attack, which left Major Bludd with several injuries. Though Bludd fought valiantly against this utterly unprovoked assault, he was unable to prevail against the American's dirty tactics. Cobra infantry teams have been dispatched to find and capture the perpetrator. Any locals receiving this broadcast should be on the lookout for this well-known foe of Cobra. A reward has been posted for information leading to his capture."

Aug 08 - Wrigley Field massacre
Wrigley Field in Chicago, sight of numerous Baseball games and the sight of murder and destruction last night.

A female reporter stands just in front total destruction. Shattered bleachers, crushed flooring mangled infield, smoke, yelling, bodies, EMTs and Fire rescue scatter about trying to help and move who they can. Police are among the rescue workers. Crying and yelling can be heard behind the woman as, visibly shaken; she attempts to stay professional and looks at the Camera.

"According to eye witnesses two Decepticons; a large black semi and the infamous Air Commander Starscream attacked the stadium in the midst of a baseball game just moments ago." she pauses as someone yells something loudly then continues. "What they were here for no one knows. As fast as they came, they left. We have some raw footage taken by cell phones that may lead us to determine what they were here for and why." she nods toward the cameraman and her image is replaced by a shaky grainy cell phone footage of a large black semis crashing through the stands, running over humans. With two metal grabbers jutting out of the side of the rig other humans are picked up and tossed into the semis trailer which has the top missing. Once the rig hits the infield is speeds up uncaring of anything or anyone in front of it and escapes through one of the dugout entrance ways.

That film is replaced by another cell phone cameras footage of a off white, blue and red F15 hovering above the ground and pivoting in a circle, lasers blasting, destroying people, and property in a wide arc. As the jet pivots around its last shots are on what is obviously an Autobot. A yellow Porsche. The Autobot goes down when hit and the F15 suddenly stands on its tail, ignites its afterburners and climbs into the sky. The camera follow is shakily for a moment then the image fades back to the reporter.

"Humans have been abducted, killed, injured. Numbers are only known being roughly estimated as 100 dead... how many injured -- dozens. We still don't know how many are missing yet. This entire section of Chicago has been locked down. If you have loved ones here, do not attempt to come down here. Call your local police precinct or any one of the hospitals in this area. The US Military has been notified and the Air Force is sending in patrols. The Autobots have also been informed and we are awaiting their reply."

Aug 08 - G.I. Joe invades C.U.?

 * Live from Crown City, People's Republic of Cobra Unity*

This is Gwen Ross, A.P. news systems, with a live report from the People's Republic of Cobra Unity.

It appears that earlier this week, the G.I. Joe team set up a base, or tried to, *inside* the borders of the C.U. The reports I am getting are that G.I. Joe set up a Pre-Fabricated Base just two miles inside the territorial borders of C.U., and that on her own authority, The Baroness ordered the base investigated. The Joes fired upon C.U. forces, but were thrown out of the C.U., and the base was destroyed.

Unconfirmed reports list 30 dead, and many more wounded.

Stay tuned for more on this developing story, as information breaks.

September 11 - Human Rights Groups, Governments Decry Execution
-- Human rights groups and governments today are decrying the execution of two gay activists in Trucial Abysmia. The two youths made international headlines weeks ago after their kiss in front of a mosque in Trucial Abysmia went viral. Of course, Shiekh Saud made headlines last year when he declared his land did not have homosexuals in their midst. *picture showing Shiekh Saud and Shiekh Mohammed at the execution*. Trucial Abysmia drew headlines for their efforts to help in the flood effort, drawing praises from both Earth leaders as well as Autobot Leader Optimus Prime.

Oct 02 - GI Joe Commander Addresses UN
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - In the waning days of the meeting of the UN General Assembly, General Abernathy of the United States Army, commanding officer of one of the United States' elite special forces units known as GI Joe, addressed the assembly regarding the allegations by Cobra of his organization's invading and building a base within the borders of Cobra Unity 2 months ago.


 * "First off I would like to thank the assembly for this opportunity to set the record straight. To get right to the point, their allegations are, to coin a phrase, total poppycock. The following footage I am about to show you will prove within a shadow of a doubt that our operations were in fact well within the borders of Iraq, and through their destruction Cobra in fact launched an unproked attack against a sovereign nation's territory, that being the aforementioned Iraq." the General was quoted as saying. The General's presentation showcased video, audio, and GPS positional data provided by the Autobot Silverbolt during their recent flyby of the former GI Joe base. The footage showed that the base was well over 10 miles inside Iraq, and clearly not within Unity territory.


 * After his presentation the General continued his address. "As you can now see, our base, constructed with the knowledge and permission of the Iraqi government, was completely destroyed by Cobra for no reason other than its existence and was a clear violation of Iraqi territory. We ask that this matter be taken up by the Security Council for review." Before the General finished his address, he took the opportunity to speak on other matters. "Before I finish, I would like to also take this opportunity to address some other rumors floating in the media that the United States, and by extension GI Joe, haven't provided any assistance in the recovery from the flood. This is also poppycock. At present US armed forces, GI Joe included, are providing food and medical aid in numerous countries, including Japan, which has been hard hit not only by the flood but by the tsunami early last year. We have also instituted numerous children's programs in an effort to restore hope in areas that sorely need it. Any statements to the contrary are just so much pig slop."


 * Experts have verified that the data provided by the General is genuine and has not been digitally altered or enhanced in any way. Based on this information the General's recommendation to the Security Council has been taken up and the Council intends to meet within the next month to determine if any repercussions from this incident are justified.