User blog:Spikewitwicky/March 7th, 2016 - Spike's Journal Entry



What a cluster.

First off, suppose I should start off on a good note: my voice is almost back to full strength, and I'm not spitting up blood anymore, so the internal bleeding has stopped from Dr. Arkeville's attack.

Secondly, good news - we have a new arrival, Metalhawk. He originally worked on the Ark project (like original as in nearly 4.5 million years ago). But he got into an accident, and ended up being stranded on a planet for nearly 4.5 million years. So, envision the movie Cast Away, and extend that for like 4.5 million years. Mentally, I don't know what that would to do a person's brain...or programming. I hear that prisons occasionally do solitary confinement, and even that is condemned by human rights groups.

The weird thing is...he's totally socialable. In the repair bay, after a few minutes, he and I were talking like we've known each other for years. I'm wondering...and I may ask Ratchet if it's OK to do a study on prolonged isolation for people like Metalhawk (as a 'certified' medic now, I have to sumit one study a year to the Cybertronian board). My theory is that Metalhawk probably did 'go mad' at some time, being isolated, but as time went on, his systems were able to 'correct' themselves. Again, it's a theory. The medical board is tough as hell, so I'll have to defend it. But this is just a first-reaction 'gut' feeling. I could be totally wrong.

Anyway - back to the cluster.

Wheeljack is PISSED at me. And as a result, so is dad.

Here's why: After Crosscut and I decided to pull the trigger and effectively end our  arrangement with Dr. Arkeville, I had Pipes  destroy all of Dr. Arkeville's experiments. Without Wheeljack's permission. Honestly, I thought ALL of Dr. Arkeville's dealings fell into the 'diplomacy' portion of the Autobot ranks. I guess I was wrong. But here's the rub - I told Pipes to put the damn things in the incinerator. And apparently, he just effin' took a torch to them in Wheeljack's lab - so Wheeljack's lab is a mess. Yes, it was always a mess beforehand, but it was HIS mess. HIS system.

Originally, I'm guessing dad would side with me. But the moment the "code" thing came up - of respecting someone's workspace. Well, if you're a mechanic like him...and hell, even me, though I'm nowhere his level, I get it. If someone came in and rearranged my workstation, I would be pissed. If someone came in and torched it, I would be livid. So, today, I'll be doing clean-up. And getting a lecture from dad.

Since no one's reading this...time for some 'illogical phobia' ranting. Wheeljack said he forgave me, but he's pissed. I've been told I've been a great help to the Autobots, but to be honest, it's nothing compared to what they've given me. Despite all of the trauma...and occasionally bodily injury, I know I am one of the luckiest humans on Earth. And I keep thinking someday, this is all going to go away. Like Wheeljack gets super pissed off, and says "that's it, you've crossed a line, you're out of here."

And then what? I can't take care of dad full-time. Will Carly really, I mean, REALLY love me if I'm some mechanic instead of someone who can at least partially come within 50 miles of being on her level for her job and brilliance? I read this bio on Eugene O'Neill - this playwright. He came from poverty. Rose to fame writing these great plays. But because of that early upbringing, he routinely feared that one day, all of that would be taken away. Days like yesterday make me feel the same.